Operation Carebear

We are (unfortunately) at the stage of considering who looks after Emily when I go back to work and so we are in the throes of visiting both daycare centres and home-based care providers.  

It is a funny day when you realise that nothing, no matter how good it is, will actually be good enough for your little poppet, that is for sure! 

I have met with 2 home based carers from different companies and am not convinced on the model they use.  The carers often have their own children, and so, school drop offs and picks are included in the general day - all while taking all of their own children along for the ride, but of course the children they are looking after too; plus they usually go to an activity provided by the company a few times a week (some go out to these most days).  And so it means a lengthy car ride for Emily from our home to the carers' home, and then a lot of to-ing and fro-ing during the day too, and then that same lengthy car ride home at the end of the day.

We have been pretty home-based while I have been on leave, hang, the first time I did the grocery shopping with Emily was when she was almost 6 months old!  And we went away overnight for the first time when she was 5 months old!  And there are many days (in a row even!) where I don't drive, and so Emily doesn't travel in the car very much at all, only when necessary.  

So you can see the reluctance we have with all the driving she may do, while at a home based carer. 

So we are also thinking about daycares.  Something we thought of ages ago and then discovered the home based care option, so we went off daycare and all the little bugs that the children generously pass onto each other!  But it seems we are back to daycare now just to keep our options open.

I have visited 2 so far, and plan to see another one next week to be able to compare properly.  It has been a very interesting experience, not having ventured into a daycare before! 

So watch this space for an update!

Operation Sandman

Since having the Baby Sleep Consultant over last week to chat to my coffee group, I have started Project Sandman ... AKA Spaced Soothing / Verbal Reassurance with Emily to work on the length of her lunchtime sleeps.  Previously, when she went down, if she squeaked after say 45mins or an hour, I would simply get her up and keep going with the day.  But that sometimes meant she was awake from her 'lunchtime sleep' at 1.30pm, and then you have the rest of the day to get through too!  And she can just last for 2 hours of awake time between sleeps, so that is a LONG afternoon/evening! 

But you are apparently meant to get this sleep to 2 hours, or even better yet, 2.5hours. 

Waking from a lovely sleep!  Ready for play time!

Using the Spaced Soothing method, when you hear baby wake up you give them the chance to settle for a few minutes, and then go in and say a phrase/quietly sing to them and basically reassure them they are ok but that it is still time to sleep.  And you try not pick them up unless they are very upset as it can make things worse!  Easier said than done that is for sure!  

Then you leave the room, wait 2mins, and then go back in and do the same thing, increasing the time you are out of the room by 2mins each time, up to 10 or 15mins, depending on what you are comfortable with.  I have made it to 10mins so far!! And hopefully baby goes back to sleep.  Hopefully.  And you should try this for 40-60mins.  Sheesh that is a long time!

Hmmm....  Well I said I'd give it a week and this is what has happened:

• Saturday lunchtime: Slept for 1.5hours, and I attempted my technique for the first time.  It took 40mins for Emily to go back to sleep and she slept for another 45mins - yay!  It's working!  I must say I had not imagined she would end up crying, but she did, having woken up happy, and it's very hard listening to her cry and kind of just leaving her, at these intervals, but it did work so I am still keen to give it a go.  Hang in there Mummy!

• Sunday early morning: she woke at 6am and you are meant to encourage baby to wake at 7am, as an early morning wakeup can really affect the whole day, bringing all sleeps forward and making the evening routine time tricky.  I was definitely too hard on her, poor baby, at this time, as I tried until 7am to get her to go back to sleep, with no luck.  And she had slept through the night since 6.30pm the previous night with no wake ups, so was probably genuinely hungry, poor baby!!  I think I mustn't be too strict with this routine!  And on reflection I am sure by 'early morning wakeups' they are much more referring to those little poppets who wake up ready to face the day at 4am, argh!

• Sunday lunchtime: She only slept for 45mins and I tried my technique for about 45mins (stressful) and then she slept a further 30mins, so not such a great sleep.  Daddy was at home this day and she must have known it and not wanted to sleep!

• Monday lunchtime: disaster struck.  Emily and I went grocery shopping for the very first time together and we were out for about 20mins too long.  She fell asleep in the car on the way home and woke when I got her out of her car seat, most unimpressed!  I put her straight into her cot and while she was quiet for about 30mins, she didn't sleep.  I tried my technique for about 40mins before deciding she is not going to sleep.. and she was getting truly hysterical at this time.  I hate to see her so upset from being tired!  So we went for a big walk and she was practically asleep before we hit the top of the driveway!  And we ended up walking later that same day too, at the time when we usually walk, so it was a let's get Mummy fit day!

• Tuesday lunchtime: Epic Baby (EB) strikes again!  With no help from me at all, she slept from 12pm - 2.15pm!  Wow!?!?  Let's hope it continues every day is your only thought!  But during her sleep time, I also constantly clock watch, thinking 'I wonder how much longer she will sleep', and my heart skips a beat when I hear any peep from the monitor!  It's actually kind of stressful!

• Wednesday and Thursday lunchtime: Epic Baby strikes again and sleeps from 12pm - 1.50pm with no help from me... this I can handle!  Now, what to do during these lovely long lunchtime sleeps :)  Knitting / scrapbooking / cooking of some kind anyone?!

• Friday lunchtime: She slept for 1hour and then woke up.  We had to go out at short notice in the morning and so we didn't have time to do milk and then solids, only milk, plus she fell asleep in the car on the way home.  5mins from home.  Argh!  I think she is hungry but  I attempt my technique for 30mins and then get her up.  No point in dragging it out!  I don't think this will work every single day, will it?  I guess you are aiming for a point where baby just goes to sleep and stays asleep!  I know we are making great progress.

• Saturday lunchtime: Emily slept from 12pm - 2.15pm without any help!!  I am thrilled, surely she is in the zone now?  Yay!  It's been a week now!

• Sunday lunchtime: Epic Baby strikes again, sleeping from 12pm - 2.15pm, even while knowing her Daddy is at home!  Last week Sunday she did not really want to sleep much, nor the Sunday before that, and I am sure she knows Daddy is home and wants to play with him!

So, a successful little project, and a happy well-rested baby and Mummy - phew!  Well done Emily and thank you Baby Sleep Consultant for all the tips on how to tweak our routine!  Let's hope it long continues. 

We have a new project coming up (2 projects actually) so watch this space!  Sweet dreams!

Happy little baby!

Sleep... Baby.... Sleep!

I recently hosted my coffee group (well one of them, as I am lucky enough to belong to 2 amazing groups!) and we had one of the Baby Sleep Consultant team come round and present to us on sleep and everything else for 5 - 6month olds.  

Sleep Baby Sleep!

Wow, it was fascinating!  I was pleased to hear quite a few of the 'negative' sleep associations, we haven't really used, or we did when Emily was little and she has kind of just outgrown them herself, so that was reassuring.  These are things that help a baby to go to sleep but they need you to help with, such as using a dummy (especially if baby can't put it back in for themselves), rocking and feeding to sleep etc.  Emily has never really been a fan of a dummy which is fine by me - I only just recently saw a note on how to get your baby to take a dummy and that is after you feed them milk, you give them the dummy as they are in the sucking zone, but I think I only ever tried to use it when Emily was already too upset!  Whoopsie!  And of course we rocked and fed her to sleep when she was tiny, it kind of just happens that way as the little babies can barely keep their eyes open, but as soon as I learnt about eat - play - sleep, I was onto it and not rocking or feeding her to sleep and we soon moved past that, phew!

Some of the positive sleep associations we use are white noise, which we have on for all sleeps, especially overnight; a sleeping bag - nice and toasty, we use a Ricochet one from the Baby Factory; and sleeping baby in a dark room for all sleep - day included.  

We also talked a lot about routine... Ah the routine.... My friends and I often wonder to ourselves who these people are whose babies are in A Routine.  Ours aren't!!  Well, Emily kind of is, but the Baby Sleep Consultant really stressed that IF you want a routine, you do have to work on it and get your baby into it, and that way you know baby is getting enough sleep and food too. 

Now that Emily is almost 6 months old, this all actually makes sense!!  It sure didn't at the 6 week mark when I was like, right Baby we are getting into a routine!!  Which didn't work almost at all, however now I feel I know a lot more, am more confident and am willing to give it a go.

So our routine is (roughly the same as before, but we are tweaking it now!):

• 7am - wake and feed (no solids yet as she isn't showing much interest so early in the day)
• 9am - 10am - nap for 45mins - 1 hour... and yes... it is suggested that you wake your baby if they are still asleep at the 1 hour mark!  It goes against everything in me but it is apparently meant to help them sleep better for their 'lunchtime sleep'.  Yes THAT long one! 
• 10am - 10.30am wake up and play etc - usually photoshoot time!
• 10.30am - 11am feed and solids
• 12pm - 2.30pm - sleep time.  This is like the holy grail of sleeps apparently.  And yes.  Babies are capable of sleeping for ages here! Hmmmm..... That remains to be seen!!  If Emily wakes when I put her down at midday or so, after however long (it may only be 45mins), I would usually get her up... but oh no, you are 'meant' to resettle baby and get them to sleep for longer.  How??  I will cover that in my next post!
• 2.30pm - 3pm - feed
• 4.30pm - 5pm - short walk, round the block for a last snooze
• 5pm - feed (I have added this extra feed in as I don't think Emily is ready not to have it, it's kind of our cluster feeding)
• 5.30pm - solids
• 6pm - bath
• 6.15pm - feed
• 6.30pm - bed

My Little Bear

At the moment we are working on Spaced Soothing, and my next post will explain what it is and how we are going!  

Sweet Dreams all!